Take Your Clothes Off and Be Naked!!!

Being Naked. For some reason, I have been thinking a lot about this concept lately, and then I realize I have a friend who is loving being naked, who is so open and sharing in a culture I thought was not possible to be like this or I might have misplaced my hope (in the judging Turkish society of course). Then one of my yoga teachers, Mey Elbi, wrote about it on her blog (in Turkish, Çıplak Olmak), and I found myself talking about this topic with others and even people I just meet (could be considered a stranger but then we talk about such an intimate topic:)) Then, I can't help myself but write about it, feeling the extraordinary exciting energy of this month, with 3 eclipses and the Full Moon/Lunar Eclipse coming on June 15.
So, what does being naked mean? Do you consider yourself naked if you take your clothes off, or when you tell someone (could be a friend) a secret, or tell them something that is embarrassing for you, or something you hardly share with others?
Well, I say, being naked is all of those things. In other words, it's literally taking your clothes off, or taking your masks, roles, acts, etc. off off off!
And I think it is a great thing:) Just think how much we are wearing. It's not just clothes we wear, but all those unwanted, ugly masks that are stuck to our faces, our body, our posture, even possibly tangled up inside, our aching muscles, sore bones... Some of us don't even realize these masks, and in that case maybe you have no idea what this is about...but keep reading:)
In some cultures there are hardly any clothing, possibly that is limited to mostly tribes in which also transcending healing and spiritual ceremonies or activities are practiced. They are truly being themselves, connecting their souls with each other and other energies in the universe during those ceremonies. Some of these ceremonies actually have healing power as they unravel hidden traumas. It's similar to yoga and meditation or even other therapies (modern people call these alternative therapies). A Tribe is described in the online dictionary as any aggregate of people united by ties of descent from a common ancestor, community of customs and traditions; a division of some other people. We, the modern people, call these tribal people weird because they are naked...don't we? Because we know better, because we have research, data, medical tools, weapons, etc. We know what life should be like, what 'Normal' is...
I don't think like this anymore. I'm not even sure if I did think like this before, but I'm realizing now that I've also lived with wearing too much, I want to be just who I am, who I met and loved while living in US. I grew into myself in US. And why did this self decide to move to Turkey where being herself, naked, is like jumping in the middle of hungry tigers? Don't ask me, that is still unclear:)
I feel now I can be myself, I can accept the tigers and let them be the beautiful animal they are on that side of the territory and just have a long-distance relationship with them. I, myself can move on to make friends who are themselves, naked, in a different territory, forming a community, and have a close relationship with my kind; in a tribal fashion. Community is described in the online dictionary as a social or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists. It seems to be similar to a tribe, don't you think? Just what I needed in Istanbul. Happy ending!
So, in the end, being naked is being open, being who you are. Who you really are, only you, and accepting this whether you like it or not, and sharing this in any way you feel like. Not allowing others to force you to wear anything that you don't want. It's also being physically naked and accepting that we are humans, we have beautiful bodies, the skin, the senses and we have feelings! It's Your body and mind, so do what You want with it. Let go of yourself, let if flow... It's already there, you are already happening the way you're supposed to. So, dream if you want, or sunbathe naked, or make love, or go to that place you've always wanted to go, or share something with someone that you've never shared before, or do something you've never done before! Or you may simply do nothing and take a break for yourself, to feel yourself, and be naked:)
Just like Black & White...Just like the White Snow melting into Clear Water...

A Late Morning in Bodrum...

So, I woke up this late morning and instead of doing yoga I started reading a book in bed while birds provided me beautiful live music and I realized how much I've missed reading in bed in the morning...later mom calls and as we're talking.. I say "People have started to come to Bodrum, and I'm realizing its going to be really crowded here in the summer, I like it empty, calm and quiet..." and mom says " Well then maybe you should go to Iceland or maybe Montana was good for you with 3 horses and 2 humans"...and as I'm laughing I'm thinking Iceland isn't a bad idea:) Wasn't that what I wanted; calm, quiet and peaceful nature? Yes that is still what I want, and I thought it is impossible to have that in Istanbul, a city so overwhelming and dense as descibed in Defne Suman's book, but I'm also happy that I've been able to reduce the uncomfortable effect of the density or intensity in Istanbul. Of course this happened by doing yoga and meditation everyday, and later with the help of some new friends, Istanbul become a livable place for me, an option. Does this mean I've adjusted or maybe started to adjust to Turkey? No idea. But I'm thinking I still need to go back and forth from Bodrum and Istanbul...Then I'm not sure yet, could be Iceland...:) Well, later I did do my yoga and breakfast and now I'm writing as the refreshing rain is stopping and birds are starting to sing again as the sun starts to smile...:)

Meditation and Handstands

I am in love with meditation as much as I'm in love with practicing handstand these days. Never did I practice these on a daily basis, but it is a fun journey! These 2 practices used to be pretty difficult and a bit scary for me and I usually chose not to do them, but now I realize I was scared because I lacked the self-confidence and courage. Now that I'm actually learning the proper way to meditate and practice handstands I can't stop doing them every morning. Adho Mukha Vrksasana (downward facing tree), the Handstand is so fun:) OK, so every day I get my legs and hips straight up there somewhere, but then I gracefully fall back down. I can't stand upside down on my own and I don't like doing it with a wall because for some reason that scares me too, maybe I prefer the comfort of a person not a wall. So, this yoga pose is said to improve your sense of balance, calm the brain and it helps relieve stress as it provides you with energy. So, great to do it in the mornings, followed by a long and deep meditation, definitely reenergizes me. The common barrier is the fear of falling since humans normally don't stand upside down, but that's what makes it fun actually. Just watch some kids and you can see they love poses that seem absurd to adults because they have no fear and they love to play. Why can't we all do the same?.. For the adult body who is tangled up with stress (from simply living on this planet) you would need to be comfortable and correctly do Downward facing Dog and Plank poses as preparation for practicing Handstand...If you don't know what I'm talking about then don't even try this yet...Then when you're ready, from Downdog, as you inhale, step one foot closer to your hands (lets say the left foot) and allow your shoulders to stack right on top of your wrists, (similar to coming towards plank pose) gazing down somewhere between your hands, neck relaxed. Exhale and as you engage your core (the bandhas) straighten the other leg (the right) and flex the foot as you kick up. You may want to just kick up with that straight leg for a few times. Then, rest in Child's pose for a few breaths...and start again. This time as you kick up, bring the other leg along to stack your hips on top of your shoulders, and if you can stay like that great, if you fall or are afraid try it facing a wall or with someone holding you at the hips. Once upside down need to remember to keep the legs close and straight and the feet flexed...and keep doing this until you're tired, then rest in Child's pose before continuing your practice. By the way, flexing the foot is stretching your toes towards your head. Check out yoga journal for detailed info.
Funny that I actually was going to write about Meditation and how my life has improved with Meditation...I find myself writing about Handstands as well:)
So, I'm just in love. I can practice yoga and meditation all day and I'm just limiting it to my morning for about 3 hours of practice which is easier to do here in Bodrum. I had given myself homework about 2 months ago while I was in Istanbul to practice meditation every day and see what happens when I do it in the middle of chaotic Istanbul life. Well well well...it worked so beautifully:) I couldn't manage a routine every day, but I did manage to practice meditation somewhere in the day whether it was 5 minutes or 15 minutes (tried harder to do it in the mornings as it sets my mood for the day). Even just a few minutes if I was in a rush would help me internalize and remember that everything that is important, everything that I need is inside, not outside. No need to get angry or hurry or judge, life will happen as it is supposed to. All the love and peace is already within me ever since I was conceived, it just takes a few minutes of closing your eyes and sitting silently without moving to remember this...Even if there is a traffic jam, mean guys yelling for no reason, kids screaming, impatience, unrespectful people, pain or confusion or a nice atmosphere around you...it only takes a few minutes every day, just close your eyes and watch!
Well, after a month had passed I was so happy and thought yes I figured out this Meditation. Haha! Then my knee started to hurt again and became a limitation to my yoga and meditation practice. It became more painful to sit in meditation. I didn't want to go to yoga classes, I wanted to practice on my own. Then (just when I needed the motivation) we were advised to start our own practice during our yoga teacher training...oh how I missed that..to practice for hours every morning on my own. So I tried harder to practice myself at home..and was going to Bodrum where I can easily practice on my own anyway. Before I left, one of our yoga teachers was giving a meditation course. So I went. He said it's common for people who don't know meditation to think that people who meditate have no pain, but they actually do and they are able to tolerate the pain. I was translating the teacher who spoke in English to a crowd of Turkish yogis and when I heard him say this I couldn't help myself and say "Really?" and in my mind I'm thinking, 'I had no idea. How did I think I knew meditation' and 'That must be why I didn't like meditation before because I didn't want to tolerate pain? Huh? But what about my knee pain, I thought pain in the knee meant the start of an injury?'. So, when you don't know and sit in meditation and feel pain you may quit or think you aren't able to do it. But my knee pain? He said if you feel like it's an injury then you may change your sitting position, otherwise you need to sit without moving for 30 minutes, eyes open gazing on the floor in front of you. Hmmm
Later, I continue to practice meditation every day. I start to think: Could there be some psychological pain? Maybe. I feel the pain. I accept it. I don't ignore it and I'm not pushing it away. But I want to understand it. I think I am ready for Family Constellation (Aile Dizimi) a meditative therapy method to help unravel difficult family entanglements. I realize there is some unfinished business in my family's life. I may have solved some of it while living abroad away from family, but it's not complete yet. I want to continue, I want to bring it out to the open!
And we'll see what happens next. I've come so far to accept life as it is with the help of Meditation. I also now feel I can actually live in Istanbul. I can see a community there too, and some work. Maybe Bodrum isn't my only option. Wow! Change never stops right...transformations never stops! That is the beauty of life. And even more beautiful is watching these changes with your eyes closed happy in your core:)
Thank you for reading, it was long but beautiful I hope:)
I finish with the words of one of my fave songs by Donna De Lory, Bathe in These Waters:
Lost. Criticized. Hard to reach, hard to find. You will rise, I'll watch you fly. You will shine..in time. Bathe in these waters..bathe in these waters..and wash it away...wash it away...
Far..far from grace..wearing the past..on your face. You will change. Nothing stays the same. You will find..your way. Just Bathe in these waters..bathe in these water...and wash it away...
Hara Hara MahaDeva Shambo..Sharanam...

The Gold of the Incas

Quinoa (pronounced Keen-wah) a Super Whole Grain, was considered the gold of the Incas and is mostly grown in Peru and some other South American countries. Not only is it a rediscovered ancient whole grain, and the Mother of all Grains, it's one of the best protein choices for vegetarians because of its complete amino acid content meaning it is as close as you can get to the high protein quality of meat. Probably even better than soy protein since soy is highly genetically engineered nowadays, because it's very cheap to produce and easily fed (however unnaturally fed) to the excessive amount of animals that are brought up to supposedly feed the world! Anyway, by now you probably know how I feel about these genetically engineered foods and poisonous ways of growing food; I don't like it, so let's get back to Quinoa which is my favorite grain.
Once cooked quinoa has a fluffy, creamy, slightly crunchy texture and nutty flavor which I love. I mentioned it's high in protein, but it's also high in fiber, vitamin B2 (riboflavin), and minerals such as manganese, magnesium, iron, copper and phosphorus. So, it's good for pretty much anyone, but especially for heart health, bowel issues and helps to control blood sugar levels as well as satiety. Quinoa grows on stalks with large seedheads that can be almost any color, from red, purple and orange to green, black or yellow. It's been designated a "super crop" by the United Nations, for its potential to feed the hungry poor of the world because it's drought resistant and NASA has proposed quinoa as an ideal food for long-duration space flights. Pretty cool I think!
Read more about Quinoa here.
The only problem with Quinoa is that you can't get it local, unless you live in South America, but still I think it's worth buying because of it's high nutrient content, especially if you're a vegetarian. You can find it in most Natural or Whole Food stores. I was told it's not found in Turkey and that I have to order it from Europe or US and so I have been asking friends who visit from outside of Turkey to bring me as much of Quinoa as possible:) But I found it in Istanbul, actually my brother found it in the store called Safran in Nisantasi, Istanbul. Yeeey! It's a great Natural Food Store I highly recommend you visit (Address: Valikonagi Caddesi, 58, Nisantasi, Istanbul). The quinoa they sell is not labeled as organic and they apperently import it from Russia who probably imports it from South America, so it comes a long way poluting the air. But, at least someone thought of importing such a wonderful grain that's not grown here, so I'm still happy with what I've found. So now I can cook it whenever I want or maybe I'll try to grow it here by sprouting:)
And here is my easy recipe you can use to try Quinoa. I added some Turkish words to clarify some meanings.
Quinoa with Veggies

Serving Size: 1.5 cup

Makes about 3 servings.

Ingredients:

1 cup Quinoa

 2 cups water

1 Tablespoon olive oil

1 green bell pepper (2 tatlı biber)

1 red bell pepper (2 tatlı kırmızı biber)

1 cup of sliced mushrooms, any kind

1 cup of chopped zucchini (about 1 large zucchini)

4-5 strings of green onions or chives

Directions:

1.      Wash and then cut up the vegetables into cubes, except for the mushrooms.

2.      Place the quinoa and water in a saucepan and bring to a boil.

3.      Reduce to simmer, cover and cook until all water is absorbed, for about 10-15 minutes.

4.      While the quinoa is cooking add the oil and chopped vegetables (except for the green onions) in a pan, cook at medium heat and stir the vegetables every 30 seconds or so until they become softer.

5.      Once the vegetables are cooked, add the chopped green onions and stir few times to cook all vegetables together.

6.      Once both the vegetables and quinoa are cooked add the vegetables in the pan with the quinoa and mix.

7.      You may choose to add a pinch of sea salt and/or black pepper to the dish, but I usually cook without them. So I suggest try it without salt and then add salt if you really need to.

8.      Serve warm. Enjoy!

Note: Best part of this recipe is that you can choose any kind of vegetable you like to mix with the quinoa, and you can really chop them up any way you like. You can either mix other vegetables with the ones I chose here or you can choose your own vegetables, such as eggplants, spinach or broccoli. Also you may choose to eat the vegetables raw, in that case, just chop them up and mix them with the cooked quinoa and wait until the dish cools down for a cold quinoa salad.

Images are from Google.
Let me know about your experiences with Quinoa. With Love. 

Do You Need to Bottle Feed?

Another breastfeeding related online article of mine after the 'Why Six Months Exclusive Breastfeeding' article. Just click on the title and the website with the article should come up. Hope it's useful to some!

I Am From Venus!

Yep! Lately, I feel like I am from another planet, such as Venus, living in Istanbul on Earth. If I was coming from the planet Venus to inspect Earth, I would probably say this world sucks (pardon me), the living creatures here have no humanity although they call themselves human. Although, would it be easier to inspect this world and the creatures living on it as an outsider (as in someone from another planet) or insider (living within the community)? I consider myself as an outsider, foreigner living in a new community. I can't tel you where I'm from really, at least not one place, and I don't think I can call any place home anymore. This makes me so insecure about where I'm living now...dah!
But, guess what happened...I finally got myself to sit in silent meditation! (ok! it's been only 2 days in a row now, but it's been awhile since I did it). I had tried this before, maybe several times a year during a yoga class, in the beginning I hated it, was so painfully boring, and then after 6 years of yoga practice, my yoga teacher training required me to do that everyday for a month and somehow I loved it then and promised (huh?) myself I would keep doing it everyday, but of course I didn't do it once we got other assignments. But it has been always on my mind, "I have to meditate today or I have to do my own yoga practice at home today" ...it's not like I hadn't done it before, but my mind is so good at finding excuses and getting angry ever since I'm living in Istanbul.
I'm reading a book in Turkish called Mavi Orman (Blue Forest), by Defne Suman, a Shadow yoga teacher living in US and Turkey. And I'm thinking I'm so good at picking the book that exactly matches my mood and my needs at that time...this has been going on for about a year (cross my fingers!). I decided I love this book from the first page I read. Actually I love the title too! It's making me think a lot, reflect on myself and the changes in my life. I feel my yoga practice is supposed to be doing this to me, not this book, but maybe I needed the extra kick of inspiration from this book.
Actually just when I've been thinking..."I think I've learned everything I need about yoga" I am being bombarded with all these new concepts, techniques, ideas about yoga that I had no idea existed or for some reason I had been ignoring them for so long. Now I know the more I practice and the more I experience life, searching and learning never ends!
So, going back to my life in Istanbul being an alien from Venus.
I don't like what I have become while living in Istanbul with my parents. I don't feel like myself, it feels like all my self-work, from doing yoga and growing in US are gone to waste which feels like a nightmare coming true!!!
So, this is why I feel alien to a culture, house, people that supposedly I could say I'm part of, but I don't think I am really. Also, what's the point in forcing it so hard? Yes I know life is hard anywhere whatever you're doing, but I don't have the same desire to go on as I did when life was hard in US. Maybe it's the lack of a community, a safe place for me to feel welcomed and at home. I haven't found this in Istanbul, not with old friends or with my family and can't say much about new friends since it's too soon....but I have hope for Bodrum, I had the feeling of a community where I belong there, so Seriously! I just have to get settled there as soon as I can.
Anyway, I forgot to mention what happened after the meditations...I felt so comfortable, safe and at home while sitting in meditation, I felt it within me, I was IT, the safe home. And once it was over I was able to carry that feeling throughout the house and into majority of my day. Wow! This is amazing! Could I possibly do this everyday? Since, I have definitely decided to live in Bodrum and my time in Istanbul is temporary and we know the ecstasy mood after yoga and meditation is real easy to continue when you're not in a chaotic living space, Can I do this in a chaotic living space? or in other words, Could I meditate everyday in my chaotic life in Istanbul and hold on to the safe home ecstasy feeling right in the middle of chaos? I know I can do it in a full hot Baptiste style yoga class where the person literally next to me is dripping their sweat on me (and mine on them), so why not in a super crazy, smelly and crowded city like Istanbul when even living with my parents seems so crowded to me? This is going to be my homework to myself while I live in Istanbul! If I can do this then maybe I won't have to be so irritated and angry in Istanbul, I might learn something very important. Or maybe I am really from Venus and they're going to come back for me and save me from this planet:))
We'll see...I'll write to you from Venus:)
I love these words from a teacher, "Take a deep breath, and let the moment go." It makes it easier to end things when you don't want to end it but know that you have to.
Love to you all:)